Well, the launch of the Co-Worker Hall of Fame was a hit. Apparently almost everyone has an obnoxious and fat co-worker who waddles. It sucks doesn’t it?

Anyway, I think its about time for Wendy to have some company in co-worker infamy. So, without further ado, let me introduce you to the next inductee….

Smokey Joe - Now, everyone has probably worked with someone who smokes. In fact, I currently work with several people who do. Every couple of hours they go take a 5 or 10 minute smoke break outside and that’s that. Well a while back I worked at a pizza joint for a couple of months. Joe was one of the guys on my shift… lucky me. This guy was a 20 something high school dropout who was personally responsible for 50% of Marlboro’s annual profits. Normally I wouldn’t have much cared that he smelled like a surviving passenger of the Hindenburg, but Joe’s passion for smokes severely cut into his work time. Often times, we’d forget that Joe was there until he’d proclaim it time for yet another smoke break. In fact, it got so bad that the manager still instinctively checked out back for Joe 4 weeks after he had been fired.

I personally, had no idea that someone could smoke that much. You know in the movie Courage Under Fire, when Matt Damon’s character is being interviewed and he lights up off the butt of the smoke he just finished? Amateur. Right before he got fired, Joe had taken up the ploy of keeping a deck broom by the door and any time it opened he’d grab up the broom and start acting like he’d been scrubbing the walkway the entire time. That worked out pretty well for him until our boss pulled up one night and sat and watched Joe smoke 10 cig’s over the course of 30 minutes while doing absolutely no work. He got fired on the spot and didn’t even have the respiratorial fortitude to argue his case. He just stood there wheezing angrily and as his crowning glory flicked his still lit cigarette at the manager before storming off… and of course lighting up another.

Welcome to the Hall, Joe. I hope my tax dollars don’t end up supporting you when you get emphysema.

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